I apologize for another rant, but I need to get this out:
I literally cannot understand why some parents can't teach their kids to respect other people's homes. Cool, they do whatever at your house, but this isn't your house. This is my house. We have a different set of rules. We enforce rules. We expect those rules to be respected and followed by you and your children.
It's not that difficult to understand! Clearly another example of why common sense isn't common.
When the rules are blatantly disrespected, yeah, I don't want your kids in my house. Because you don't enforce anything. You come to my home, treat me like a baby sitter, and don't bother to discipline your kids. What? I can't enjoy company, too? It's my house. It's not my job to parent your kids. What's worse, is that my husband kisses your ass because of sibling loyalty and just lets it happen. Then he defends YOU! Says you're a good dad and I'm just nagging and need to calm it down.
Then I become the bad guy, accused of not being about family. All because I don't want my home destroyed. All because I want my rules to be respected. I want my home and family to be respected.
Don't ever accuse me of not caring about family. My faith revolves around it. What's your faith revolve around? Oh, that's right being selfish, dropping your kids off at other homes because you're lazy and don't want to deal with them in public, oh and putting business before family. You're a much better parent than me, clearly.
Be a fucking parent and teach your children boundaries and respect, especially when to comes to other people's homes. Discipline them when they break rules. Stop using your family and friends solely as your baby sitters, especially when you're present!
And my thick husband can't figure out why I'm mad. Well, if he didn't "ignore" me like he told his brother over the phone, then he'd know. Gods know that I've tried to talk to him about it. Clearly any negativity towards his brother, he ignores. I don't understand blind family loyalty, I really don't.
So my husband went over there to watch his kids and took Wolfman, despite that he knows his brother's hoarder. Their house is filthy and cluttered (nothing like what's on TLC, but give it some time [and they wonder how they got roaches at their last place; better not bring any travelers home]--I haven't been to their new apartment yet). I don't want my son in those conditions. Doesn't matter to my husband because it's all about family. Clearly not about health concerns, safety, or rules, nope, just family. Something that I'm apparently lacking. According to my BIL, I don't know anything about family.
Maybe we'll move down to West Virginia and spend more time with an in-law who teaches and enforces rules? Who's not a hoarder. Who's not selfish. Yes, my SIL is 10000000000000 times a better parent than her brother. I'm not special, he disrespects her, too; uses and verbally abuses her. And they're enablers; they just sweep his rudeness under the rug, because they don't want to deal with it. He's an ass and the issue needs to be talked about!
I stand up for myself and I'm the bad guy.
This freaking family. What the heck did I marry into?