Maybe I should get back to regular grounding? But then, that would require some alone, quiet time. Some meditation time. Right now, the only time that happens is in baby boy is napping or in bed for the night. When little boy two comes, there will be no time, unless we get lucky again, and he's a long napper, like his brother sometimes was. But I don't like dealing with the maybes concerning meditation and grounding. I don't like the jarring, disorientation that comes with uncertainties. It defeats the purpose of the exercise.
When I was a college student, I had no problem grounding in a public place. All I had to do was stop, close my eyes, and do it, ya know? Helped a lot with my anxieties! Course I was also meditating 2-4 days out of the week! I don't meditate so much anymore. I want to. I think a meditation session will allow me to meet up with Artemis, since She's invaded my thoughts with antlers and such things.
As I've mentioned before, I'm going to have a natural birth this time, or try. No epidurals. Can't push in the butt if you can't feel your butt. I've been thinking a lot about how I'm going to handle the pain. I have a low pain tolerance, but I survived suffering hours upon hours of agonizing gall bladder inflammation nearly a year ago. It rivaled childbirth (I needed two injection, and they did wear off, which is good, otherwise I might still be trying to push my first son out). That experience gives me confidence that I can handle childbirth. Hopefully.
I've got some plans, although birthing plans don't always go as planned, if at all. I figured I'd dim the lights, maybe have some music in my ears, and give myself a focal point, something Artemis related, as one of Her aspects includes childbirth. Might as well try to work with that energy. With my first kid, I wanted to hold carnelian and rose quartz during delivery, well, I left my stones at home! This time, I'm packing my focal point before hand!
I don't know that I'll be able to ground, but desperation drives you to try just about anything. Until I find myself in the hospital, I'm going to starting grounding and centering myself at night, for some practice. Instead of drinking that shot of whiskey or glass of wine, I figure some lavender tea and grounding might be better this time around concerning Parent Bootcamp Pt. 2. That and I wonder if grounding will help me with my depression, too?
Might as well try it. I know it's not going to cure me, but it might help me deal, help me to calm myself and focus on goals. Help me in the long run.
Hm, maybe I should've just waited to read other PBP bloggers before settling on the failed "Gain"? Eh, I'll just add it to my own list.