Saturday, February 8, 2014

You're Pregnant, You're Supposed to be Rational!

Said no sane person ever.

I really don't understand some of the people in my family....especially the one's who've given birth.  It's like they don't remember what it was like being pregnant and how much crazier that makes a woman.  I know that pregnancy affects us different, not all go bat-shizz crazy, but I certainly do!  I'm an Aries, which means I'm hella worse than usual, especially when I'm mad.  Hormones make me even more irrational than usual.

To some of my family, especially my mom, the moment I show anger or frustration, I'm being selfish and ungrateful.  I'm whining and being a bitch a bitch's sake.  That may be so, but damn it, give me some leeway!  I'm pregnant!  I'm hormonal!  I'm crazy!  I laugh, cry, rage, and am apathetic all within five minutes or less!  I can't control it, but I apologize for acting in a certain way.  AFTERwards.  

Like last night, I tossed a spoon at my husband, hit him in the face on accident, and I started crying, then a minute later, I was fine, sitting in the bathroom just clipping my nails.  WTF?  Hormones are strange creatures...yes, a chemical is a beast right now.  Majority of the symptoms during pregnancy don't even remotely make sense.  I don't see how having my mood swings go crazy is helping to grow my fetus.  If anything, it's just driving people away.  How is that helpful for anyone?

But no, my mom's not even allowing me to do that--get my mood swing on, chill out, then apologize--at the moment.  I'm can't explain my actions, the reasoning, or even give an apology.  Did I mention that she's also menopausal?  Which also turns a woman bat shizz crazy, and she's an Aries too.  This has not been a fun pregnancy, guys.

I just don't understand why no one, who knows I'm pregnant, isn't cutting me some slack.  I'm not completely incapable of controlling myself, but there are times when you just blow up or burst into tears.  I don't understand how more pregnant women don't murder people in the heat of passion.  You'd think there'd be a lot of that happening.  But instead, some of us only succeed in offending and driving people away.  Some of those weaklings are expecting us to keep acting like our old selves.  To act a certain way.  What do you want me to be all fluffy, flowery, and mothering?  Trust me, I'd like to be.  Gotta be better than the broken wheel of emotions.  It's frustrating!

If I go off, do not take that personally.  Certainly, don't retort in a way that makes you look foolish while you're trying to berate me (true story, happened about a week ago).  Let me calm down, reflect on the stupid crap I said, then apologize for acting so bitchy.  Don't fight back.  My husband has learned this the hard way.  Fighting back only makes it worse.

I don't know if my mom's not cutting me any slack because she's a shallow person (cares more how others see her than her own children's feelings) or if she's just menopausal.  Either way, this shizz sucks.  Stupid drama made worse by hormones.

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