Thursday, October 31, 2013

Plague or Not, We Prowled!

 Daddy as Grandma, Mommy as Red Riding Hood, and Baby as the Big Bad Wolf!  Due to the rain, wind, and chilly weather, we didn't stay out long.  Not to mention, Lycan and I are still getting over colds.  But we still reaped the benefits of Halloween!  Many of the people we seen tonight simply loved Lycan!

 Twas something out of a fairy tale.  We even had an evil witch: Maw Maw!

Great first Trick or Treat with the babies!

Hope yall had a Happy Halloween and a Blessed Samhain!


Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Ugggghhhhhh, I am the plague!!!!

Dude, being pregnant and sick?  Awful!  Bad enough that my nausea is so much worse this time around!  I've already thrown up more times in the last month than I have my whole life!  I'm not a puker.  Headache, congestion, snotty nose, coughing, mucus, sore throat, faucet nose, achy body, and nausea?  I just threw up my dinner.  And some of it came out of my nose.  I just hope I didn't throw up my prenatal vitamins.  I barely got to the toilet, barely got the lid up.  Still had to clean it the seat. 

And my baby boy is sick.  He got it from his cousin, I got it from him.  He's a day ahead of me and is feeling much better today.  I'm hopeful to have a great first Trick or Treat with my little man.  Weather permitting, of course, if not, SOMEONE's hosting a costume party in November.  We searched high and low for Wolfman's costume.  It's not going to waste! 

For all I'm going through 1) I had better still be pregnant and 2) It better be a girl!

Ugghhhhhhhh, I'm going to bed.  Second night I've called off.  Tomorrow night is off.  And I've learned that I was supposed to request Friday night off so we could drive down to West Virginia for a wedding.  Wonder if I'm going to be hunky-dory for that event?  Honestly, as long as baby boy is feeling better, I'm happy, even if I'm laid up.  This weekend will be the first time he meets his great grandma on his dad's side.  So yeah.  Trick or Treat.  Samhain.  Great Grandma.  BIL's wedding. 

What a week to get sick.

Oh, and Happy Big 30th to the Hubs!  Whose big birthday plans were ruined by his little brother's peer pressure wedding.  It's cool, got a plan for that, unbeknownst to him.


Sunday, October 27, 2013

We're Coming to Get You and Your Little Embryo, Too!

In realizing that there's no point in dwelling on that which I do not know, I'm just going to keep on, keepin on like everything's okay, because for all I know, everything is.  I've already told my mom, who told my step dad, who accidently told Facebook, then recanted and deleted after my mom told him that it was a secret.  So, this time if I miscarry, I won't be alone in my misery.

Speaking of miscarriages, I wrote a status update on Facebook in regards to "helpful" online sites, concerning natural soothers verses chemicals soothers.  Advice for both me and the many preggo friends I currently have (three, in counting).

First, awful nausea, worse than with Lycan.  So my step dad, who's a Master martial artist, taught me a pressure point just below the knee, that when pressed for 2 minutes, alleviates nausea.  And it really works!  "Find the indentation on your knee.  Three fingers down, on that third finger, press and massage."  I burped really loudly, and my nausea was gone.  Success without drugs.

Second, I need something that Tylenol isn't helping with.  I've had a headache for the past two days and I just need something.  Some relief, and I prefer NATURAL means.  Sleep, hot shower (usually works for me), cold rag, nothing is working.  According to sites, I can't have lavender, much less Lavender oil against the temple, so other means, right?  I generally asked my Witch friends about natural soothers, they answered, and I looked up what was safe.  And here's the rant born from that search (these brackets [] are my in-blog edits and additions):

Man, I need a real herbalist--no offense Az--look online for stuff to aid my preggo friends the natural way (for one of my blogs) and all I'm finding are mixed reviews!  This same article said that it's okay to drink some filtered Jasmine, Peppermint, Lavender, and Chamomile teas, then further down, said that even a little of any of these could cause miscarriage!  Da fuck?!?!!? 

Which is it?  Safe or dangerous?  This is what happens when "professionals" do shotty research.  Telling ME to go to a herbalist, but they can't even do the research themselves for their shitty, shotty "helpful" article.

It doesn't help to go to "professional" sites because EVERYTHING LEADS TO A MISCARRIAGE!!!!  EVERYTHING!!!  It's like cancer or autism!  Got a cramp?  Miscarriage.  Nauseous?  Miscarriage.  Gassy?  Miscarriage.   Little bit of blood after sex?  Miscarriage.  Glowing skin?  That's probably cancer and a miscarriage!  Feeling movement?  That's not a baby you're feeling, that's a miscarriage! 

Do not seek advice from websites.  Especially "doctors" or WebMD.  They will freak you out
[and make you think you're dying or turning into a freakin zombie!].  Thing is, I doubt that they even know what causes most miscarriages [as my doctor told me when I miscarried the first time; most of the time, they don't know.  Lots of women, myself included, want answers, so I guess they just throw anything out there nowadays].  A woman has one and she ingested this, therefore it must be a causer.  No.  Like, some fish and raw diets.  Those are major preggo no-nos [fish high in mercury]....yet there are some cultures who only eat raw meats and fish....and they seem to be able to reproduce alright.  Mercury or no mercury.  [now granted, most of us don't live in a society where fish or raw meat is our primary source of nutrients, but still.]

Let's just not eat or drink anything, k?  Just vitamins.  Vitamins and water.....oh wait, just not tap, because tap water can lead to.....  you guess it, a miscarriage.  By the Gods, dude.  Everything's out to kill your baby!  Natural means of soothing?  Nope, all of those things will kill your baby, according to pharmaceutical companies, but here, our expensive DRUGS and CHEMICALS are healthy for you!!!!!  Pharmaceutical companies, don't even get me started on those assholes.  Umbrella CORP. anyone?

Now some advice from our local "everything's a miscarriage" survivor:  63tt53e43w1`3tu63rse

You read it here first.

I am, by no means a professional; I don't look professional, type professionally, or even claim to be a professional.  I always ALWAYS tell my readers that I'm not a professional or trained anything, and to do the research themselves.  But a lot of websites out there claim or at least have the look of being/are actually paid to write "helpful" blogs, but they don't do the research themselves!  Or even provide links to where they got their information from, or books that can help you, links that can take you to real herbalists!  Most college students do more real research than most of these "helpful" bloggers do!  AND we're required to give a list of our sources!

Wikipedia is crap, for one.  It's fine for Fanfiction and shit like that, but do not base your entire article on that website alone. 

We have to cross-check our sources and go to unbiased sources.  We're encouraged to find more books, journals, and scientific articles than online sites.  But the same doesn't apply to some of these "professional" do and don't preggo sites.

Keep that shizz in mind, readers.  Ask a doctor, a real herbalist, a licensed mid-wife, read real legit books, cross-check, and go to unbiased resources.  Or shit, ask real people with real experience on the matter, keeping in mind that what works for some, isn't going to work for others!

Double-edge dagger, a lesson that I've learned concerning photography, just because someone's studied and has a degree doesn't mean they know anything.  Those without the schooling, yet have real experience, they're probably more knowledgeable (that's where cross-checking comes in).  Only one of my prenatal doctors actually had any kids.  One of my stress-test nurses, she was completely ignorant, and yet I'm to believe she was an expert on what was going on inside my womb?!?!!  I'm getting to the point of belief that if you're ass doesn't have kids--be them adopted or born from you/spouse--your ass shouldn't be a doctor or nurse in the field of pregnancy, babies, or kids. 

In most cases, experience trumps education.  Maybe it's just the hormones ranting here, but damn it, that's how I'm feeling at the moment.

Rant over.

*A friend of mine said something about liability.  Well, that is true, we are a sue-happy society.  Annnnd I think my step dad's original post about me having "a bun in the oven" may have been seen by more than I thought...because of one of my friends--Az--just made a public "baby-brain" comment.  I'm trying to see if she means I've just got baby on the brain, still reeling from Lycan's journey, or if I need to do some damage control....

It's one thing to have my family (mom, step dad) know, it's quite another to have the FB family know, especially if I don't know if everything's all right!

Whew, crisis averted!


Saturday, October 19, 2013


So...I think I may have miscarried again.  Last night, as I was heading out the door for work, I felt searing pain rip through my right side and down into my leg.  I went to work and had to leave early because it was just painful.  And I needed to talk to my husband about it.  I was shaking, weak legged, and dizzy.  I was scared, and I needed him, a I needed a shoulder to cry on.  He suggested that it might have been a cramp (since I did have a cramp in that same leg earlier), which calmed me down a little.  He also reminded me that I had a couple of these scares when I was pregnant with Lycan, too. 

Around 4 am, I was woken up by intense pain in my stomach, below my belly button....but then I had a horrible bout of diarrhea with it and gas, so maybe that's all that was?  We had fast food yesterday that tore me up something fierce, on top of already having a sour stomach.  

Either way, I can't do anything about it, except wait.  See if I start bleeding in about a week or two.  Times like this I wish I had my own ultrasound machine.  But, maybe it's all in my head, but my symptoms have lessened.  I know that symptoms aren't constant, but this is the first time in 3 weeks that I haven't gagged horribly while changing a poopy diaper!

Some would suggest I go to the emergency room or make an appointment with a doctor, but that's how I found out the first time, through ultrasound.  And around this time of the year, too.  Needless to say, I'm a little traumatized. 

...I'd rather just wait it out, as torturous as that is.

With already having Lycan, I was hoping that I'd be a bit more positive this time around (which I was), because I know that my body's capable of producing a living, healthy, baby.  But also, being realistic and in preparation, I was hoping that even if I did miscarry again, it wouldn't be as bad, because I have my son. 

This morning, when I saw my little Wolfman, the fear and worries that come with a miscarriage did fade, for the most part.  Lycan is my main priority.   His smiles, his growth in body and in mind.  His laugh.  Takes that pain away. 

I don't know what it is about this time of the year.  I'm hoping that it was nothing and that all is well, but part of me is certain that I lost the embryo last night.  I'm just waiting for that blood now.


Friday, October 18, 2013

That Red Monster

With teething sometimes comes diarrhea, and with diarrhea sometimes comes horrid rashes.  I was proud of myself yesterday.  Lycan had woken up screaming and crying, he had diarrhea and pooped a lot.  It went up his back.  I cleaned, gagging horribly, but I got the job done!  Wiped, changed his onsie (thank the Gods, he was wearing a onsie!), put on diaper cream (because he was kind of red around his genitals), and ta-da.  He was fine for a while.

After two water poops, he got a really bad rash on his butt.  Child was not happy.  Didn't want to sit on his butt on all.  Holding him was near impossible because he was avoiding my arm.  I gave him some medicene for the pain, creamed his butt, and can I just say that I hate baby wipes?  Have you ever wiped them across your own scratch or tender area, like your nose after it's been running for a while?  They burn!  It's awful!  WTH wipe makers?  Do they know it burns?  That child screamed bloody murder when I gently wiped his butt!  Poor little guy.  I felt so bad. 

Maybe it's just the off-brand wipes, I dunno, but Parent's Choice (Wal-mart), Comfort Choice (Kroger's off-brand), and Up&Up (Target) burn on tender skin and scratches!

So yes, he was in no mood.  I tried to get him to lay on his belly, but all he would do was stand.  I was at a loss, so I text my mom, asking her what to do.  In the meanwhile, I distracted him, which worked, for a little while anyway.  Eventually I just put him to bed, where he slept until his dad got home, and then some.

Mom suggested we take off his diaper and let it air out.  So we did.  About two hours of that, Lycan pooped in the hallway.  Hubby put him in the bath tub to clean up and that child acted like he didn't have a horrible rash on his little bum.  He was so happy and playful, splashing.  Child loves baths now.  He loves the water. 

While he was splashing, I remembered that we had baby powder!

After his bath, he dried him up extra good, and powdered his butt.  He was in much better moods after that!  Before we put him to bed, hubby put down a layer of diaper cream and powder, I'm just glad he didn't poop through the night.  Woke up in a much better mood this morning.  I fed him, changed his pee diaper and saw that the rash was almost gone.  Giant sigh of relief. 

With him teething, it's not going to be the first bout of diarrhea or rashes, but at least we have a game plan now.

Any tips or tricks about diaper rashes?


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Apple Cinnamon Recipe

Sunday, for a family pot luck, I attempted to make Apple Cobbler from scratch.  Well, I ended up making Apple Cinnamon Bread.  Happens a lot actually.  Like the first time I tried to make brownies from scratch, I ended up making cake instead....yeah, I dunno.  Skill, I guess.

Here's the cobbler recipe that I tweaked in order to get the right consistency and ended up some yummy bread-ish dessert:

  • 6 Red Delicious Apples, peeled and sliced
  • 2 cups flour
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 2 tsp cinnamon
  • 4 large eggs
  • Some milk (I just added until I got the right consistency)
  • 1/2 cup melted butter
  1. Preheat oven 350 degrees
  2. I used a regular size cake pan, I dunno the dimensions, sorry.
  3. Peel, slice, and place apples into pan, we did multiple layers, keeping in mind that the flour mixture will expand a little.
  4. Mix flour, sugar, cinnamon, and eggs until it's lumpy and coarse (or as hubby said, "it still need to be mixed!"  No it doesn't)
  5. Pour over apples
  6. Add sliced apples on top and sprinkle some cinnamon
  7. Pour butter over dish
  8. Bake for 60 minutes
  9. Add vanilla ice cream, caramel sauce, or Reddi Whip.  
The picture will never do it justice!



Monday, October 14, 2013


All right, well after nearly throwing up on Lycan while tryng to change his poopy diaper, I'm just going to come out and say it.  I'm pregnant again, and I knew it when I wrote that one post a few days ago about my what was aling me.  So if there are anyone here from my FACEBOOK, DO NOT TELL ANYONE, NOT EVEN ME!  Okay?  Secret from the Facebookers, from family and friends.  But I'm being slammed with symptoms and need a place to vent and journal. 

Yall will ruin my reveal plans if you blab, k.  Facebook friends and family who come across this bit of news, KEEP YER YAPS CLOSED AND FINGERS TIED UP!  K?  Cool?  Moving on. 

This is good news.  Scary, but good.  Scary because Lycan is only 9 months and some change, but exciting because it's another baby.  Lycan is an....exhausting child.  Very demanding and kind of whiny and his mommy.  He gets "no" when he wants to, but he's definitely a fan of testing the boundaries.  But overall he's a great child.  I just hope this one in my womb is more...chill.  More like his/her Uncle Brandon.

I'm only a couple weeks preggo, but knew it immediately.  My sense of smell shot up, my sensitivity to odors kicked back in.  I was nauseous and gagging all the time.  I see food and I want to puke.  I think about some foods and I start gagging.  And I'm hungry all the time.  I'm tired.  Boob pain.  Heartburn.  Can't focus for too long.  And it's only been 3 weeks!

Morning sickness, damned if I do, damned if I don't.  Nausous when I first wake up.  I eat and sometimes it works to make the nausea go away and other times I'm finding myself over the toilet.  It's worse when I'm at work.  Couldn't tell you how many times I've gone running to a bathroom, gagging!  Sucks!

My hormones JUST got back to normal, and now that I'm pregnant again, it's like they're going haywire.  I'm being SLAMMED, guys!  Extreme sensitivity to bad odors is a HORRIBLE symptom to have, especially with a baby.  I literally cannot change a poopy diaper without gagging violently and throwing up.  I can't properly change his diaper.  That's awful!  Most of his poops have been pretty clean, but this recent one was messy and I couldn't wipe his butt!  I just fought through it and put another diaper on him.

Guys, I've tried some things.  I put lotions, vapor rub, and even vinegar under my nose.  Doesn't help.  I need to remember to buy some nose plugs from work, see if that helps.  It's a god awful symptom to have.

I can't have sushi.  I can't have hot dogs or deli meats (well, I can if I cook them properly), which sucks because we bought a bunch for dinners and lunches a couple of days before I took the test.  I just discovered Pumpkin Spice Latte's and they are the shit, and now I can't bash on them like I want to because of the caffine.  I can't have some herbs that I love, like lavender.  Which I recently bought a big box of lavender tea.  Can't taste batters with raw eggs--luckily, I have hubby for that.  Can't have medium rare steaks or burgers.....all of these foods I've been enjoying since Lycan was born, lol.  No more.

Won't be able to handle some of the products at work, due to chemicals (like paint thinner) and/or weight.  I won't be able to pull/push the heavier L-Carts or pallets.  Shoot, and forget crouching down to put product away!  Now that's not for a while, but still.  Hopefully I still won't be stocker by then. 

My palets's gonna have to suffer again, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.  Gotta replace the junk with healthy foods again.  I've been taking Folic Acid until we can start buying prenatal's again.  And just gotta keep dealing with hiding my symptoms at work, but the stomach bug excuse isn't only going to last for long before they--mainly the mothers--are going to notice that something's up, and I've been using that reason for 2 weeks so far.  However, one of them is 2-3 weeks late with her period, so yeah, focus is off of me for now. 

Got me, possibly a co-worker, one of my friends, and a cousin (both are neck-and-neck--20 weeks) with a buns in our ovens.

So much to do.  At least, I'll be able to get health insurance without too much problem, unless the Government Shutdown is affecting that, too.  Last time we were denied because I was too far along.  WTF?  Really?  That's bullshit.  At least with Obamacare, Insurance companies won't be able to turn me away because of a "pre-existing condition".  Fucking sharks.  Gonna get that first--in the works--before we make an appointment.  We are NOT going back to the same hospital.  Screw that.

Won't be able to get on WIC as a preggo mom until the temper tantrum has ended.  Or re-certification for Lycan.

In other news, our landlord hiked up our rent by $40.  $40.  What?  Good thing we don't have a dog anymore!  This drafty, insect ridden, small apartment is NOT worth $710, AND they're going to start making us pay for water.  The fuck?  So yeah, my mom's offered to pay the deposit on an apartment or house if we move up to northern Columbus by her (she and my husband work at the same place and she's offered to carpool).  I'm going to start to look for work up there, sooner than later.  Or at least transfer to one of the stores by her.  That and the school systems are better where she is.  Hopefully by December/January (whenever rent is up) we're going to be moving.  Yay. 

What's going on with yall?


Friday, October 11, 2013

Halloween Costumes!

Yay, I ordered my period costume today.  I'm so excited.  Had to order it in parts, but still just thrilled that I was able to find the parts needed in my size.  I am a hefty chick afterall.  Hopefully the online place I ordered it from won't disappoint.

  • Tiered Petticoat
  •  Racerback Corset
  • Edwardian off the shoulder cropped blouse

A Victorian Bustle Dress is still on my list, as well as a parasol and a top hat.  I'm obsessed with Steampunk and clothing from 1850's-1960's.  It's a past life(s) coming through, saying, "Hey, remember me?"

AND I'll be able to wear the get-up to future Ren Faires.  YAY!

Instead of wearing a red cloak or cape, I'm going to be wearing a red shawl, although I wish I could find a red parasol, reasonably priced.  A different spin on Red.  That and if it's hot, I can use the parasol instead.  But I'm really hoping it's nice fall weather. 

But we're doing a family theme:  Red Riding Hood, Big Bad Wolf, and Grandma.  Yes, hubby is dressing up as Grandma, although I think the Huntsman is better, but who am I to stop him from living his dreams and dressing in drag?  ;-)

Man, Wednesday, we drove all over north Columbus trying to find some Halloween places, especially ones that sold a particular wolf costume.  What's up with wolf costumes being hard to find?  I mean, retailers are selling some RANDOM baby costumes: triceratops, skunks, frogs, and some other horrid ideas that I can't remember.  However we found this one and totally love it!

I'm so excited!  Oh, and I need a basket to complete the illusion and for candy collection.

bounce bounce bounce!

Tuesday, October 8, 2013


Having one of those days, where I wake up with a killer nauseating headache and baby refuses to take a nap without a fight.

  1. Woke up too early with a raging headache
  2. Forgot to eat breakfast
  3. Headache was so bad that I was gagging
  4. Laid him down for a nap, in which he did not
  5. Lost his binky, then couldn't find the other one
  6. After much searching found it
  7. Had to apply a ton of lotion under my lip so I could change a poopy diaper
  8. Still hungry
  9. Just laid him down for round two of naptime

Hopefully he sleeps!  I can only eat when he's asleep (because I don't like to share! And he's super demanding when it comes to food).

In other news, he's outgrown his bottle and a fifth tooth just broke through with #6 close by.

We plan on doing a family theme for his first Trick or Treat: Me as Little Red, Lycan as the Big Bad Wolf, and hubby as Grandma?  Yeah, I dunno, I think he should go as the Hunter, but for some reason, my husband wants to dress in drag....don't get it.

It today over yet?  Oh, crap, plus I have to work tonight.  UGH, FUCK IT!  I just wanna sleep!  Today is one of those days where I wish I was a rich house wife who has a live-in nanny, DESPITE that I don't need her because I don't have a job.  Except, I'm poor and have a shitty job.  Still need a nanny for days like today because I feel awful.

Week two of me feeling like shit on a stick.  


Tuesday, October 1, 2013


Proud to be an American, where I at least I know I'm fucked (especially since I'm poor and female). Didn't care about this whole government shutdown thing until I learned that WIC would be also be shut down. Figures politicians are so upset about Obamacare CLEARLY they're thinking about their citizens and not the money.  They're fighting the good fight, so it doesn't matter WIC is taken away from mothers and children who need it most.  Shit, according to most of them, it's a crutch.  That we poor mothers are taking advantage of.  (Yes, some are, but that's only a handful; unfortunately, it only takes a couple spoiled apples to ruin the bunch.  Most politicians wouldn't know poor if it came up and ass-raped them with a huge rusty meat tenderizer!)

The Great Temper Tantrum is what I'm calling this period.

We're on WIC.  It's been a great help, even with them having cut the amount they give us.

That's. Just....fantastic. Fan. Tastic. I'm holding in my sheer joy.  I might just.....explode....from my excitement.

I shant focus on this, however, even though part of this "money-saving" shutdown affects us, because there are more important things in my life to focus on.  Unlike most struggling families who also depend on WIC and other such programs, we have family who help us buy food for our son.

I don't really care for Obama (I'm moderant, btw, not liberal, republican, or democrat), nor know a whole lot about his care, but shutting down important programs like WIC is bullshit. Then again, America's not known for giving a shit about its poor, so I guess I can't really be too surprised, can I?

It's only the land of the free, if you're a rich christian male!  Oh, and straight, or at least straight in the public eye. 

It's just....fucking...selfish.  

As George Carlin said, once upon a time, "It's called the American Dream because you have to be asleep to experience it."  It's a shame that they only care about what's fair for they can't see people, especially infants and children as anything more than dollar signs.  Nope, they're not lives, they're cents.

I'm so disappointed in my country.