I'm not too big into that whole center of attention thing, but soon it'll shift to him. And I thought that showing every single gift is stupid, especially for pictures. Especially when someone gives you a laundry basket of baby clothes. Clothes which I don't think will fit him, but I can either sell em to Once Upon a Child or cut em up for rags.
I wish I'd gotten more diapers and wipes, though, I got a shit ton of clothes, most of which I don't think he'll be able to fit in period. But like I said, "Rags". Most of the clothes were newborn! Like that'll last for the first month, if that. I didn't put clothes on the list for a reason. That and mom said that's normally what most people give ya. Though I'm more of diaper person, for showers I give ya shit you're gonna need, like diapers and wipes. Like there have been times when I was the only person to give the gift of diapers! No doubt mom and WIC will chip in with diapers.
My mom was more excited about the clothes than I was. She was showing off what she got him before the party even started. She's goofy. No doubt I'll be getting more clothes from her, but more for the other months of the years to come.
And my aunt--who I adore and has gone through so much health issues since I've been pregnant--kind of made fun of me for the name chosen. Saying, "You need to think about him." Like, sorry, I don't care for common names. I think it might have been a generation gap, though, because some of my friends think the name is cool. Once again mom voiced her opinion over hating his middle name, despite that it's one of Dave's grandfather's names. But I told her, "Mom, we changed it to Leo. Leo is Leslie's middle name." She liked it more, as do we. That way if he doesn't like "Lycan" he can go by "Leo." Though I think I might be calling him "Wolf".
However, I did tell them how I wanted to name him Victor or Vincent, but hubby was dead set on Lycan. So I let him have it. Compromise, guys. That and his other boy names sucked.
In the beginning of the shower, I was kind of bummed about a BS reading I took shortly before the party, a whopping 185! Due to such a high reading, I was suffering the effects of a headache and nausea. Luckily it dropped to 78 during the party, though. OMG, and I ate the best mac n cheese I've ever had! It was delicious. Lifted my spirits a bit!
Gift registries are useful, but they kind of take out the surprise of getting gifts, I've learned. I almost can't be genuinely happy when I get a gift, because someone will say, "Well, that's what you had on the registry." Like it's it a chore instead of a gift. Of course I'm thinking, "Yeah, but you didn't have to get it. The fact that you did is fantastic and I really appreciate it." You didn't have to get me anything. I can't be happy that you got me a gift? It kind of sucks the fun out of it, I guess.
Oh, and that brings me to my step mom. I love her and all, but she's just....selfish. I was thinking of asking her for the Pack n Play this Christmas, but my husband pointed out something--something she does often. He said that she'd buy herself the new PNP, then give me her used one. Case in point, I had some natural baby grooming stuff on the list. She bought herself the good stuff "for the house" and gave me some cheap generic shit. Really? It's annoying. Keeping the goods isn't going to make me want to bring my son over to your house more often, hun. If dad wasn't such an asshole chain smoking prick, I would bring my kids over more often. But 1) I don't want my children smelling like an astray and 2) I can't trust him to not go ballistic over something stupid in front of them.
I appreciated my grandma hosting the party too, and when I tried to thank her properly, she kind of ignored me in front of everyone. She literally shrugged me off. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised since she doesn't care for me period. Plus, she was rude to my friends; it was embarrassing. I just kept thinking about my handfasting, how she chose to sit waaaay in the back, and my mom and aunts and uncles followed suit, despite that there was a table reserved for them up front. When I confronted my mom about it, she said "Well, mom wants to sit back there." In which, in my hurt frustration, I responded, "I forgot, when she says "Jump" yall jump don't ya?" She just said, "Sorry," and went back to the "cool kids" table. I was so hurt by that. And since then, me and grandma haven't seen eye-to-eye on anything. I was actually surprised that she rented a place for me at all!
Matter of fact, my step mom was also giving me the cold shoulder about something, too. I could tell she didn't want to be there. And hubby was pissed off at his family because none of them came. Then again, his sister lives in WV, so I--at least--didn't blame her. But as for two others, well, it's a little fucked up. Oh well, can't do anything about it now, though he's still pretty hurt about it.
Luckily my brother and future SIL came, as everyone was leaving, and it actually livened me up a bit. That and I was talking GD with my Diabetic friends, so it made me feel a lot better about my currant condition. Them having been diabetic for years and thus used to the scare tactics that some Teachers and doctors try to use on their patients made me feel tons better.
So, despite the downs, it was pretty good. Like I said, I GREATLY appreciated the gifts given and seeing my friends and family. I just had a lot on my mind at the time. Stress was released when we went to a friends house later in the evening for Rockband. Yesterday was stressful as HELL, but once again, the morning SUCKED but the day ended well.
My Facebook Status read as:
"Let me tell yall about my am.
Ok, so we get home around 1 to find that Bear pissed an
ocean on our floor. Around 3:40ish, Dave nods off on the freeway, hits a
barrel, and breaks our passenger side mirror. 5-something, in my exhaustion, I
misjudged the road, hit the curb, and popped our rear passenger side tire. Dave
finishes the road we're on, and bumped the door off of his leg. I lost it and
started laughing just at the sheer whatever of our situation, then peed myself
a little bit. Dave comes back and strips the bolt. Then I get wicked poop
cramps a bit later, that luckily I was able to stave off until Anthony got
there to take us to Kroger. While he and his brother are off running errands or
some shit, my 6 month 2 week ass is car sitting, can't get comfortable because
of restless legs and because I'm in a fucking car. All I wanted was to go home,
I was miserable and on the verge of tears. When I do fall asleep, I keep waking
Our phone barely has any life. Even if I did
call someone, I didn't know where I was to have them pick me up. Finally, this
thing turns into a family affair, with Anthony and Dave coming back, and Andi
and the kids taking me home (greatly appreciated, btw). As far as our car,
right now I don't give a fuck about it, BUT I hope that Dave's able to do what
he needs to do. At least he and his brother were able to finish the route.
But at least I dreamt of ferrets, so the morning wasn't a complete fiasco...and
that Dave was able to get some brotherly help. That and both my boys were
excited to see me when I came home.
Thank you, Universe, thanks for the shit storm of a rough morning. Big ole
middle finger to you, you bitch.
But like I said, it ended well, with us spending some time with my nephew and niece--I'm getting better at this kid thing! Plus, hubby was able to get everything fixed before he came home. It was funny though, I had woken up in the car, pissed off and ranting to no one in particular. Just out loud. Lycan kicked hard with a very noticeable movement, and I said, "I know, I'm mad, too!" lol
Now I'm brought to the original reason why I started to blog today, IBS. Maybe it's just my body adjusting to my diet again or the fiber overload, but I'm thinking that it's my IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). I haven't had a solid poo in like two weeks! Normally I don't have issues with my IBS until my period, and well I haven't had any IBS issues for 6 months. But lately, it's been really bad. I think it's due to him pressing up against my intestines and laying on my bladder. Or it's just a gas trigger, I dunno. Oh, it sucks. I can't wait until he's born. Between the GD and the IBS, I'm just ready. At my next appointment, I'm going to ask my doctor about it, though honestly I don't think much can be done right now.
So yeah, gross, right? Told ya, there will be some gross posts. Pregnancy isn't always so flashy and glamorous! But it seems like no one EVER wants to talks about the grosser sides! Speaking of poo, that commercial for Doggy Doo is on TV right now. lol
Back to the gifts, hubby said he wanted to go through the gifts today and I said quite rudely, "Why? We don't have a dresser yet. Might as well wait. Besides, what's the point of taking it all out, just to put everything back in the bags?" Kind of downtrodden he said, "Well, it's just for inventory reasons." THEN, it dawns on me, he's excited and just wants to see the goodies. Jeez, I can be such a bitch sometimes. ANOTHER reason why I'm ready for Lycan to be born! But when he's ready, he'll come, happy and healthy. Until then, we'll deal with the poop rushes, the blood tests, and the mood swings. And I will continue to enjoy feeling his movements....at least until he starts to play soccer with my organs. ;-)